The late Andy Rooney
Tonight’s debate between the Presidential candidates won’t be the only one, and I think it might be a good idea and make them more interesting if each of us kept a scorecard. I’ve drawn up a simple scorecard here. What you do is you give each candidate a mark of from zero to ten in each category.
APPEARANCE, for example. Giver each candidate the score you think he should have for his appearance. If he doesn’t appear at all , of course, he gets a zero.
INFLATION. From what they‘ve said, how well do you think they’ll handle inflation? You might also take into consideration whether the candidate sounds a little inflated himself.
NECKTIE. You’d want to consider color, how much you think it cost, how well it was tied and whether you think the candidate tied it himself or had a makeup person do it.
STALLING. Score them on whether or not they a- were evasive during the debate. If a candidate used a lot of phrases like “I think my position is clear on that, “instead of saying what his position is, you’d give him a low mark.
ERA. ABORTION. GUN CONTROL. This is just one category here because they’re the same thing. Everyone who is against one is against the other, and vice versa.
ENERGY. DEFENSE HAIR. Reagan and Anderson both have good-looking hair. You might want to give them each an eight, unless you think Reagan dyes his brown: then you might want to give him only a two. If you think Anderson dyes his gray, give him a ten.
STANDABILITY. This is a difficult category, but it’s important. You know how it is with some candidates? No matter what they say, you can’t stand them. Mark them from zero to ten on standability.
So that’s it. I’ve got just one more idea for the last debate. We’ll all know what the candidates think by then and we are, after all, electing a First Lady, too, So the last debate will be different. For half an hour , each candidate will argue with his wife.
For heated discussions, controversial opinions and rants.
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